Whether you're brand new to non-monogamy or a seasoned practitioner, negotiating the scope and terms of a new relationship can feel daunting. What should you discuss up front? How do you reconcile mis-matches? How do you communicate what you do and do not want? I hate to regurgitate the word “communicate” over and over, but [...]
Traditional dating within a monogamous framework has somewhat of a script to work with . . . Do you have/want children? Are you a smoker? What’s your attitude towards therapy? Did you vote for Trump? Twice? Most of us know ourselves well enough to know what will render a prospective partner fundamentally incompatible and asking [...]
After so many years, this pet project of mine has grown to 60+ entries, and I have no plans to stop . . . but that means the traditional blog format leaves something to be desired. If you're happy perusing blog content in a chronological format, please scroll at your leisure. But if you, like [...]
Many assume non-monogamy is all about the sex. So much so, non-mono folks often avoid bringing it up as an aspect of relationships. But guess what? You should talk about sex! This isn’t going to be a clinic on how to have safer sex because: 1) I am not a sexual health professional 2) Everyone’s [...]
I’m in an obnoxious amount of non-monogamy focused groups on social media. So many, in fact, that the majority of activity online most days is speed-reading the same queries over and over from various newcomers. I do not attempt to answer even a quarter of them because there are plenty of folks out there with [...]
Note: This blog post was written in the summer of 2020, shortly after the horrific murder of George Floyd in my hometown of Minneapolis. I am committed to keeping this page updated and current and will continue to do so for as long as this blog is active. Last updated: 7/16/2022. It hasn’t felt right [...]
Most of my friends identify as monogamous. They are lovely and caring and only want to see me happy! I am delighted to have them ask me questions about ethical non-monogamy, open relationships, and polyamory. Every now and again during the course of these discussions, someone will say something to me that I'm sure feels [...]
Poly With a Big Heart 